I realize that I start out with grand thoughts, and things that I will do, blog posts I will make . . . but the reality is that life intrudes. But you know what? I'm grateful for that. I love that I have a husband and kids that take up so much of my time. The tight little hugs, the long talks, the trips to the library, sitting under blankets watching movies. I love that going to church and worshipping God takes up time on my Sunday. And that when I come home, I don't want to get on the computer (which I'll admit, has been an addiction for me), but spend time contemplating what I learned, and having quiet moments to think. It's the doing of these things that's important to me, not blogging about them.
And then I thought about how I had it all set out that on Sunday I'd list 7 blog posts that inspired me that week. And that throughout the holiday season I was going to post 1,000 things I'm thankful for. And my next thought was why? Do I really need to focus so much on the numbers? Why not post about blogs that inspire me when they inspire me? Why not post about things I'm thankful for just to post them, instead of counting them up to get to a pre-determined number. It's not that focusing on inspirational things, and everything I'm thankful for isn't important. It's when I make things too planned out that I can't stop and actually enjoy.
This is something I think I struggle with in life, and not just with a blog. I start making up specific things that I need to do, and when to do them. Grand schemes that almost always fail. And then, inevitably, I feel bad. So why do I keep doing this? Why not just realize that I'm just going to do the best I can in life, and enjoy who God made me to be? Enjoy the simple things in life, clean the house when I can, take every moment to enjoy my children; because I believe it's the unplanned moments in life that bring the most joy. Not when I'm checking off a to do list, or focusing on how many or how long.
I will still set goals, I will still strive to become more than I am now. But it will be as I feel led to do so. Not Monday is this, Tuesday is this . . . I want to pray each morning, and have my day be focused on Christ, and not on me. That is my ultimate goal, and the goal that will bring the most peace and joy into my life and my home.